BTM S1E5: Paul Honeycutt
Adam Baruh: [00:00:00] Welcome to Beyond the Microphone, a podcast about podcasters and the stories of how their shows came together grew, and what they discovered along the way. I’m your host, Adam Baruh.
So I wanna spend a couple minutes talking about guest spotting. Um, it’s something that I try to do regularly and really is one of the best.
And most inexpensive ways to grow your podcast.
when you’re doing a guest spot, that’s when you’re putting yourself out there as a guest on other podcasts. And so, you know, there’s tools, um, like our sponsor PodTask is a tool where you can actually go and pitch yourself. Um, you can search for podcasts that are in your category or genre and actively pitch yourself.
To be a guest on those podcasts. And there’s other services like Pod Match and um, podcast guests.com [00:01:00] where you can try to put yourself out there. It’s a great branding opportunity for you just in general, whether you’re a podcaster or not, to go on other podcasts as a guest and just get your brand out there.
But as a podcaster, I mean, think about going on somebody else’s podcast now. You’re, you’re putting yourself in front of all these new potential. Audience members, all these potential listeners, and again, it’s free. So in my opinion, it it’s, you know, for the cost and it’s really just your time of. Going on another podcast.
It’s usually fun. You don’t really have to prepare anything and you’re telling your story in front of now. Again, all these new potential audience members, so get into guest spotting if you’re not doing it yet to grow your podcast. It is, like I said, Free and one of the best ways to grow your podcast.
So, um, with that, let’s introduce our guest here today. His name is Paul Honeycutt, a multi-passionate queer creator and multi, uh, sorry, master facilitator who [00:02:00] describes himself as a self-discovery enthusiast, which I love. Um, ’cause we should always be exploring ourselves and who we are and what our belief systems are. Um, he’s also the host of Queered Up. So Paul, um, with that, welcome to be on the microphone.
Paul Honeycutt: Thank you so much for having me, Adam. Pleasure to be here.
Adam Baruh: Yeah. I’m so happy you’re here today. So, um, let’s get started by having you just tell us about yourself, where you live, and ultimately, you know, I’m very, again, going back to, you know, your self description as a, as a self-discovery enthusiast. I definitely want to hear your journey into your own self-discovery and ultimately how that led into you creating your podcast.
Paul Honeycutt: Yeah, absolutely. I’d love to jump into that. So I’m Paul Honeycutt and I live in, uh, the front range of, uh, Colorado, just, uh, outside of Denver. Um, I don’t know where to start, like in a story or a little bit more about [00:03:00] me, but I think if you look at from podcasting, and I love what you said about, it’s the, the free jump on, get out there and tell your story.
I think that that is what I have learned is that really it’s just all about my own experience, getting to know myself, better life, any, anything that I’m taking on. Um, and so to speak to the, that self-discovery piece, um, I think over time that started to evolve where I realized the benefit of it, and you and I were speaking before we started recording, I lived in San Diego and at the time in a corporate job, I started to realize like I. And there were these things happening in my life that were impacting me in my work. And I’m like, where’s this coming from? Um, and so I, you know, being California, I met somebody who was like, let me do an energy reading. You know, and it’s like, I don’t, okay.
Adam Baruh: woo stuff. Yeah.
Paul Honeycutt: Right. Woo woo. That’s woo woo, but you’re cool.
I’ll do that. But, um, [00:04:00] really opened up my eyes to. To new experiences and started to give me this space to, um, explore. I was raised, you know, as in a, I call it a cult, ’cause it, in many ways it is. Uh, I was raised as a Jehovah’s Witness. Um, so not normal, you know, to most people growing up. Um, And then within that organization realizing that I was queer, that also wasn’t acceptable.
So I was always wondering like, where’s my space? And I kind of found it in the corporate side, but then I also was challenged with like always being like labeled the queer or like the passionate one. Um, like in leader in all leadership. They’re like, oh, he’s always really passionate. And I’m like, I’m saying the
Adam Baruh: Like as a bad thing.
Paul Honeycutt: Yeah, it was kind of like, yeah. Um, or, and I would wear things that was not, you know, more colorful and just like, show my style and they’re like, oh, he is always the one with style. And, and I’m like, what am I doing? You [00:05:00] know, how do I play in? And I think that there’s this part of, of a, of a human story where we realized like, I, I can’t do this anymore.
Um, and just the same thing of putting up with being a Jo’s witness. When I came out, I was like, I can’t do that anymore. It’s, I didn’t choose it. This wasn’t, my parents chose that that’s what they wanted for me, but it’s not right. I’m, I’m feeling bad about myself and how do I experience myself? And I think that that’s the beauty of like, any of these things, even, even podcasts and like queered up.
Adam Baruh: Mm-hmm.
Paul Honeycutt: Now I look back at that journey and I see where it started, um, and everything that I’ve gained from looking at life more from an ex experiential standpoint of what do I get to learn about myself through this,
Adam Baruh: Yeah. Um, yeah. And so when, when was that journey? Like when, when did you start to, and talk about also like. [00:06:00] You know, sometimes these revelations, these, uh, I guess truths that are within us, it takes a long time for them to come out or for us to even be aware that they’re in there. I mean, for me, I, it wasn’t until my late forties that I started to like realize some stuff about myself and, and really become mindful to it and to make changes.
Like, what was that process? When did it happen for you? And, you know, was it like, I mean, Just comparing it to myself like it, you know, when I started to kind of realize some stuff that I needed to like, put myself on track towards, it was a difficult process and you know, like opening yourself up to change.
There’s so much like conflict there, um, which I think is normal. But, you know, talk to us a little bit about when and, and how and what you discovered. You know, when, when you started to realize that you had these inner. S truths or [00:07:00] stories that needed to to come out and you needed to get ahead of that.
Paul Honeycutt: Mm-hmm. Yeah, I think it’s, well, there’s so many layers, uh, of, of a story of a, of our, as we are. Moving through things. I’ll start with the, and keep it succinct about like realizing and acknowledging to myself about being gay. Um, was this pressure that had been happening. I knew from the time I was very young.
In fact, my parents later admitted that they knew when I was, from the time I was a baby. They’re like, we kind of just had a feeling. Um, and that really plagued me. But there became a real turning point where, um, in the joist witness, Um, community marriage is like a big thing and you, you, they want you to get married young, and I did not want to get married, but it was really easy, Adam, because like you could date, Girls, but you were not really supposed to touch or do any of these other things.
So it was always like, that’s, you know, we can’t, we’ve gotta wait till [00:08:00] marriage. So I can always kind of play like I would date girls, but I didn’t have to do anything. Um, but the first, that first awareness came with the real pressure of finally, um, Just caving to this, this pressure of I can’t keep up with this anymore.
I can’t keep up with the lies. This is not me. I, I don’t buy into this stuff. It, I don’t feel good. I was very depressed, had overweight, I. All sorts of things, and as soon as I, I had a conversation with myself. I was laying on a trampoline at some friend’s house. They were all inside, and I was like, I have two choices.
I can either accept this, like I can choose to choose this lifestyle, you know, to be me, or I can suck it up and just, I’ll go get married. And I’ll do this, Jehovah’s witnessing. Um, and I was obviously, I chose the letter, you know, it was just like, I can’t, I, I can’t do that anymore. And right from there, that was a big change.
So I think it, to [00:09:00] get to your question, that was one of the first times of me really honoring something about myself where I just, it was like a train wreck. It almost happened where I, that it was unavoidable. And after that I immersed myself in the corporate world. But I think the second big piece happened when my father passed, which was nine years ago.
Adam Baruh: Okay.
Paul Honeycutt: And I think that that’s a big deal for any person when they lose a parent. Um, and we had not had any conver, we had had no relationship for almost 12, 13 years.
Adam Baruh: Mm.
Paul Honeycutt: So, um, and I got to see him in hospice. Uh, before I was taking on an overseas trip, um, and I knew he was going to pass during that time. Um, But from that point on was when things really started to brew up for me.
And I think the biggest piece was when I look back now, where there was hints and signs of like how I was [00:10:00] experiencing my life and the frustrations I were having were based on these old beliefs I had had, and old beliefs that I had been told. And so even though I had for. I didn’t know them necessarily that they were running there.
You know, these were things that I had heard from the time I was a baby on. And so our brains are really impressionable and those programmings, you know, and that’s what was running. It was impacting relationships. I started to get really angry and I was not an angry person normally. Um, and I’m like, I gotta figure this out.
Like, what is this? And the, the real step was, I was terrified to look at anything about the Joe’s witness stuff. I had done other therapy, I had done other things, but I would never address the religious part of it. And finally, um, I realized that I needed to do that and I, I found a cult recovery therapist,
Adam Baruh: Okay.
Paul Honeycutt: and she helped me really understand the programming of Joe’s witnesses and what happened.[00:11:00]
And like, you know, my, what my experience was and gave me tangible things of like, that wasn’t me. That was just stuff that was being fed in. So like this massive amount of fear and anxiety. And when I realized investing in myself that like, oh, like I can change this. I don’t have to live with this forever.
Adam Baruh: right.
Paul Honeycutt: Like, shit. Okay. Like, and then that just opened up more doors. ’cause I’ve always been curious and I love to learn, but it that I think had I not done that, Adam, I’m not so sure all the other changes would’ve come about so quickly because that was such a pivotal for me to understand that foundation block and that I was now setting a new foundation.
Adam Baruh: Yeah, I, and I love that you described that as honoring yourself ’cause that’s such a gift. And I think so many of us, again, going back, I mean, it took me, you know, till [00:12:00] my late forties to give myself that gift in the space to really understand, you know, some things that, that I had been. Dealing with for a long time.
Um, and so again, I I just love that you use that word honoring yourself and more, you know, all of us should be doing that. ’cause we all have amazing gifts and we all have stories and journeys that we go through that, that I think to a large extent are there not only to inform ourselves, but to, to help us make connections with others.
Um, and by doing so, help. To heal others and pave the way. And so I wanted to kind of, for a moment, ’cause you, you know, I think some of what you were touching on, um, could be described as like imposter syndrome. Although I think for you, in your experience, it goes back even deeper just given the fact that you were kind of born into this way of, of living and you know, you didn’t really know any better.
Um, your reality was shaped by something that was outside of your control. [00:13:00] But I wanted to just take a moment and, and have, you know, your, you know, in terms of imposter syndrome, how would you describe that? Where do you think that may have shown up or may could show up for people that, you know, maybe people that are getting into podcasting, um, or just, you know, in their lives?
Because a lot of, you know, podcasters get into this. Um, this work through passion and purpose and, and are driven because they want to, they wanna make change and, uh, you know. So tell us a little bit about your, your take on just imposter syndrome and, and how to recognize it and how to, how to perhaps deal with it.
Paul Honeycutt: Mm-hmm. I love this subject because, A lot of the stuff that I’ve realized is that where imposter syndrome I, you know, sort of feel like comes from, is when we’re looking externally and it’s so easy to have happen Adam. We look at people who maybe have, you know, huge viewers and communities [00:14:00] for their podcast or, you know, it could be celebrities, what have you, whatever you want to choose.
Um, and so we, we look at that and we start measuring ourselves against that. Those people. And so imposter. I think whenever we are looking externally or outside of ourselves, that that’s where that can come in and we suddenly, we suddenly start to question our own worthiness. And I think that that’s what imposter syndrome is, is just us coming back to the deeper question of our, our own worthiness.
And so when we find that worthiness or we can look at it and say, You know, I’m, I’m worthy to try this. I have a story. There’s 8 billion of us spinning around on this planet, and every single one of those 8 billion people have. A very unique experience, a unique perspective. Even twins will have unique experiences and a unique perspective.
So like [00:15:00] that helped me in understanding like, okay, first of all, I’m not like everybody. I mean, we are, we have so much in common, but at the same time, not because they’ll never be able to understand what it was like to journey through my experience, nor is it their responsibility. And I think the other piece that I learned from doing the podcast, because when I got to do, you know, I was so excited and I’m like, this is, and I was talking to people and they’re like, this is gonna be big.
It’s gonna do, uh, I was so pumped and oh my God, I learned something totally different, you know, doing it and have continued to learn as I’m moving through it. And I think the imposter syndrome. Does not go away right away. So it is when I think when you’re questioning, if you’re feeling that you may not term it imposter syndrome, but if you’re measuring yourself against others or measuring yourself like I should be way much further ahead.
I love [00:16:00] that statement, like, and I tell myself this and I tell a lot of people I work with, like, you’re exactly where you need to be. You’re exactly where you need to be right here, right now. And I kind of call it self soothing, but when I get into those places of like, oh, I’m just right here, right now.
This is what I know right now and I have this voice, this is what I want to say. It it, I feel it within myself, so now I’m gonna play. And I think that that’s the other piece when we look at life as more from a play standpoint.
Adam Baruh: Mm-hmm.
Paul Honeycutt: We’re able to look at that imposter syndrome and be like, well, let me play with this.
Let me, what’s my messaging? Don’t take it like too serious. And I took mine so serious and then when I didn’t get like immediately, you know, like millions of listeners right away, because of course that’s what should have happened. I was kind of down on myself, but what I looked through the initial experiences of doing that PO of the doing the podcast in the very beginning was [00:17:00] I was teaching myself audio, you know, editing sound, um, how I sounded, how did I do interviews?
How do I tell a story? How do I ask better questions? Um, how do I craft. Somebody that maybe I’m interviewing where they’re struggling to get their story out, how can I help draw that out? I learn, you know, and that also helped me to realize like this podcast was not for anybody else. This podcast is for me.
It is for me to experience myself, expressing myself, diving into the topics I’m interested in, and connecting with people and hearing their interesting stories. Learning how to build community. And that may sound selfish, but I absolutely believe in that, that that was what helped me move away from some of that imposter syndrome.
Adam Baruh: I can like [00:18:00] completely resonate with that. And I echo what you’re saying and I’ve actually spoken about this on this podcast where it’s so easy and I think it’s very common. And you know, for anybody listening here, like don’t ever. Go down the path of negative self-talk. Like, you know, the journey is the journey.
And even, you know, I started out tons of passion and purpose. You get into it. This is more in my last podcast, the change, and then you kind of like, Get focused on looking at your download numbers and the statistics and, you know, perhaps, you know, they’re not where you expected them to be, and that’s normal.
I mean, there’s so many podcasts out there, like, how do you, how do you really differentiate yourself? Um, and it could bring you down like you’re, you know, you’re gonna. And it sounds like you have too, like get to a point where you have to then kind of remember why you got into it in the first place.
Which, you know, I always recommend like write it down and put it somewhere where you can always see it. [00:19:00] Um, I. Because then you’ll, you’ll get back to a place of passion and purpose and remembering, you know what, if I’m just doing this for myself and for you, Paul, here today, right now, like if I’m just focused on the right here and the right now, this conversation, you watching me and me watching you as we’re having this conversation.
That’s what it’s all about. And I hope that my, you know, my hope is that people find this and listen to it, and it helps them, um, not only just in developing their podcast, but just, you know, in, in, you know, putting all the foundational like pieces in place like so that they can continue,
Paul Honeycutt: Mm-hmm.
Adam Baruh: a lot of podcasters get to that first year and just kind of fall off through burnout or whatever.
And I’m subject to that as well. But if you, if you can remind yourself why you got into this, and then make that foundational, that’s gonna be the thing that is always gonna feed you. And, and don’t let the external parts of what you’re doing, not only in podcasting, but just in with [00:20:00] everything. Um, you know, like over just, you know, supersede the internal reasons why he got into it.
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Adam Baruh: The other thing I wanted to echo that you said too is the play. Here’s where that has recently kind of shown up in my life because, um, in my other role outside of being a podcast host and [00:22:00] producer, um, and I have three companies that I run, essentially. I’m the c e o of a software company called Suite Centric, which is an IT consulting agency.
We’ve got like 20, 25 employees, the c e o of a company called Pod Task, which is a software platform that you’re familiar with. And just coming onto the show here, um, And so, you know, something that came up as, as c e o of Suite centric, you know, through, through the years of running this business, you know, I’ve hired various people and, uh, I had brought this person on and it didn’t work out, and I terminated them and, and, uh, I have been sued and I’m currently going, still going through the lawsuit of wrongful termination, and I won’t get into the details of it.
But I, what I will say is, you know, for a while it really brought me down and created a massive amount of anxiety and negative energy. And about six months ago, I got to a place where I’m like, you know what? I [00:23:00] think I’m gonna just be more curious about, you know, maybe the, the reason why this is in my life, why this experience is in my life.
And, you know, I can’t remember if it was you or somebody else I interviewed earlier today. Um, I was telling them about, yeah, a move that I’m making, I think it was you, right? The, the, this upcoming move, um, that, uh, that we’re looking to do, my wife and I with our kids. And I think really that came out of, you know, the curiosity that I, that I let myself engage in with.
What could have been a very challenging time and has been a challenging time now, I think, you know what? I think that experience has kind of helped me realize what’s important in my life and what I want outta my life. And instead of doing the thing that isn’t filling my cup, I’m gonna go down the path of only doing the things that fill my cup [00:24:00] and.
You know, move this move from San Diego, um, up to Marin County, which we’re hoping to do at the end of this forthcoming school year, is, is a journey that is part of that, like going up to the redwoods and raising my, my family’s up there, so it’s like raising my younger kids around family and stuff like that.
So, you know, again, going back to. You know what this all boils down to? I think a lot of podcasters and like yourself included, just get into this, um, out of passion and purpose and really get to a point of self-discovery and self-exploration. This kind of, again, going back to what, what you’re enthusiastic about.
So let’s bring it back to your podcast. Um, queered up. What, what’s the premise behind your podcast and how did you ultimately, you know, come to like, conceptualize it? Take it from concept to reality. Let’s go back there.
Paul Honeycutt: Okay, great. First of all, I wanna say that that [00:25:00] the word curious. I, I love that. So that, that was the piece that I. What kind of kicked it off was I was curious about from public speaking and I love public speaking and motivating. And then here I am, a solopreneur no longer in the corporate world. How do I start to share my voice?
And initially, as an entrepreneur, I wanted to connect with queer people. Queer professionals, not just queer professionals, but. The, I looked for that and as I started getting out there and talking to all these other queer professionals and business owners and entrepreneurs, there was a really unique story and I, I am an extremely curious person about just life in general, but one of the threads that I started to really hear through this was that, And there was this sense of, um, like fear around how do I address, how do, like, do I advertise my business as L G B T friendly, you know, L G B T owned or not?
Do I engage in the community, [00:26:00] don’t I I’ve lost business because of it. You know, there’s all these added layers. And, and that was pretty common through everybody, no matter how successful or you know, new. And I’m like, man, how fascinating would it be to understand like, how. Our lives have impacted us, and I think it’s already a bold move to be able to accept yourself and come out and either lose family or be outside of what a lot of people consider normative society, whatever that is.
Um, and I was, I’m very interested in understanding how that impacts pacs um, us as in business and in the professional world. So that sort of was. That not sort of, that was what I wanted to do with the show. What I learned right up front was like, I ended up, you know, the advice and I was listening to all these different people and, and I started to, you know, I listened to other podcasts and I was trying to craft it around like all the best advice from everybody else.
And I [00:27:00] have a really great mentor and she’s like, just tell your story. Stop listening. Don’t. Try to be Brene Brown or Joe Rogan or Howard Stern. Don’t, like, you’ve got your own voice. You are going to find it. I was like, okay. Um, so I kind of told my stories, um, you know, upfront, I wanted to give people an idea of who I was.
Um, and then I moved into, I did a whole bank of interviews up front. Um, And I learn, have learned a lot through that process where the show is shifting. ’cause I’m gonna be looking at a second season and it’ll probably stand or queered up, but there’s a good chance it’s gonna, the name will change. Um, but I’m gonna bring on a co-host because that was what I learned, that I wanted to banter and be able to play with somebody else.
That also brought a new perspective. And I hadn’t thought about that, but I realized how much I enjoy talking to somebody in an interview process. Um, But having somebody else sometimes [00:28:00] just to talk about topics that I’m interested in, um, I wanted to bring that in. So the show has definitely evolved, um, from that standpoint.
And right now I’m in recording. New conversations. Um, I’m honing it down because I want it to be more succinct. Uh, I was asking too broad of questions and the, for me, the format was going to too long. Um, and so like that’s what I’m playing with right now is like, how do I capture in and have some fun around certain parts of a person’s story or around their business?
Um, and then what are other areas where I can talk that I’m interested in?
Adam Baruh: Yeah. Um, and so was your season one like, um, mostly like solo monologue format then, or?
Paul Honeycutt: I had, I did an initial four upfront that were just all me kind of telling my story, the journey into queered up, why I thought it was important. And then the rest were all interviews [00:29:00] primarily. I did a couple monologue on some specific topics where I thought were, you know, things that were kind of happening.
Um, And I will do that. I, I, I think that that’s a piece I realized too is I didn’t have to be all interview. I don’t have to be all long format, short format. I really don’t care. Now I’m just like, I’m gonna do what I’m curious about and what feels right. So if I have somebody on that I’m having a great interview with and it’s really in depth and I’m having fun and they’re having fun, I’m gonna do it.
Um, I may cut another one short. It may be 15, 20 minutes because that’s what’s. Intuitively called for. Um, and I think that that’s what’s probably most freeing as I’m going into this next segment of doing it. ’cause now I’ve got this queered up or it, whatever the name’s gonna shift to. Um, but I’m also doing a one, um, YouTube sho, uh, YouTube one.
Um, Podcast channel with another guy, and we’re doing [00:30:00] all things around leadership, but it’s called UG leadership and we’re, we’re breaking down like silly things people talk about in leadership and um, it’s mainly post Twitter, you know, tweets, um, things where it’s like, what are they trying to say? And we’re trying to like break down what we actually think they’re trying to communicate what leadership is or what emotional intelligence is.
Um, So that has given me this space to just play and be like, okay, I’m gonna do these things. And I, and I want to go back to your point around being a guest and that’s why I’m on this show too. As I learned, I interviewed a lot. I was not on a lot. I’ve been on a several other small podcasts, but I’m like, I’m gonna start getting on and being interviewed because I wanna practice honing my story better.
I want to be more succinct. I want to think about how to bring more nuance, or how do I tie it into the work that I do from a business standpoint. So I’m really intentional about how I do things now without this [00:31:00] massive expectation of what’s gonna come. I just gonna play and have fun. I’ll have show up here, be o open, authentic, and see what happens.
Adam Baruh: yeah, and like I’m not going to, um, edit out the coughing that I’m experiencing right now because I’m keeping it real. Right. Bear with me, everybody for a moment as I drink some water. Alright. So, and I wanted to kind of actually sit with that as, as an example for a minute ’cause you brought it up and I think it’s, I think it’s super cool that you brought it up.
Um, you know, when I was doing my previous podcast, the change, I kind of like came up with this formula and then I thought I always had to like live to that formula and like episodes needed to be this length and this structure and blah, blah, blah. And. You know, we spend a lot of time editing trying to get like really high production value, quality out.
Um, and I’ve kind of since just done away with that whole [00:32:00] way of thinking, that whole belief system. And you know, really with beyond the microphone, what, what I’m trying to elicit or conversations that are just more real, whether they go 20 minutes, 10 minutes, an hour, what have you. I mean, just like, um, just play with it and, and.
And, you know, move away from this idea of perfection. And you know, in terms of the editing process, like I really, first of all, I use Descrip to just, ’cause I love that platform for producing now, just that good. It still delivers a really high like sound and production value. And um, I mean, it does have a tool to like cut out the ums and the ahs, but I’m like, whatever.
Like this is, I say, you know, a lot I get told, I, you know, you know, so I don’t care. Whatever.
Paul Honeycutt: A lot of people do.
Adam Baruh: Yeah, I’m a California kid and you know, that’s who I am and if it’s gonna come out in the way I speak, so be it, you know? So, um, yeah. Well, let’s, let’s go back to really what [00:33:00] have been some of the, the key highlights and challenges in your journey as a podcaster.
And then also we haven’t really gotten into the creation lab in your business. So talk a little bit about. Just highlights and challenges with just overall the work that you’ve been doing, whether the Creation Lab or with your podcast.
Paul Honeycutt: Mm-hmm. So I think that probably the biggest challenge with the podcast was. And that’s why I wanna shift the name, because what I was finding too is I had, I had niched myself into just queer, but I was, I queer to me is also just strange. I wanted to talk about strange things, you know, that’s interesting things.
And maybe L G B T Q with that slant. Um, But one of the challenges was breaking through the noise and feeling when I was looking at everything else in those, in that category, there wasn’t much around business. And so like that was a [00:34:00] challenge where I was like, how do I break through? I think the other piece that through the initial sets of interviews, the challenge was, um, Uh, right.
To your point of it needs to be this, I’ve gotta highly edit it. I was spending so much time doing that when it really didn’t make any difference.
Adam Baruh: Mm-hmm.
Paul Honeycutt: it was just like, do it, move post, get it moving. Um, I had, you know, I used a script two that took me a little bit to, to, to learn. Um, and then I think the, the bigger piece for me was, um, I wasn’t allowing, I, I was trying to be so professional
Adam Baruh: Yeah.
Paul Honeycutt: I wasn’t being myself, and I started to really feel it.
Um, where I felt like I was, and maybe that’s that imposter syndrome a little bit coming in, but I was like, oh, I’m putting on this. I had this voice and what I was doing. And at the same time I’m like, no, I love to crack jokes. I love to be funny. I like to laugh. I, [00:35:00] I, I don’t want to be, I’m not PC all the time, you know, but I was trying to be like, walk this fine line of making sure that I was being respectable to everybody and I dropped that shit.
Um, So that was one to realize and I think what I’ve realized is the platform for me, podcasting platform, no matter what it is, um, I. Is a public speaking is something that’s always been in my life. Being in front of people and talking has always been in my life and I enjoy it. I, I’m good at it. I feel confident in doing it.
It’s ’cause I do public speaking. This is a plan, a chance for me to potentially reach more people. And the Creation Lab, I’m not so sure the creation lab would’ve, I would’ve ever drawn that out of myself. Or maybe I would have, it would’ve taken more time. Um, But the podcast really helped me to realize like what my.
Life has brought me [00:36:00] to is a lot of experience around the human side of leadership, and that was a lot of what I did in the corporate world was leadership development, working with teams, building out those pieces. But I never did it the way that they told me to do it. I just trusted my gut and the more and more I trust my intuition and gut, I realize, or when I didn’t I bad things went wrong. Um, So that is what podcasting has helped me realize is to tap into my, my intuition. Like, no, this is, this is right. ’cause I was like, do I stop? Don’t, no, it’s going to just let it evolve. Let the podcast evolve. Creation lab is an evolution out of that. Where I, from a coaching standpoint, I was, I work with leaders one-on-one, but I help people really tap back into their intuitive.
Power because there’s an intuition that is far more powerful and will give you the answers than anything else. So I [00:37:00] help leaders come back into that and bring the human side back into leadership, into the corporate world from like a wellbeing standpoint and the creation lab. What I’ve learned too, and this is maybe a startup thing, is. I got asked to do a proposal for a large, for a bigger corporation here in Colorado to do leadership training. So I did individual leadership training and I didn’t have really programmed, but I was like, okay, I’ll figure this out. So I just worked on my proposal, built everything ki and came, you know, I presented it and I’m like, what am I gonna call it?
I’m like, well this is what came through one night. I was like, oh, the creation lab. Like that’s ’cause I’m all about how we create the play, what’s within us individually and and how do we play with that. So that’s probably a little bit more, my ethos around life now is like, just follow your intuition.
And so the podcasting and the creation lab are that and what I. I have taken [00:38:00] as a lot of research, the certifications, all of those things, and really honed it back down to a couple things when it comes to leadership. Is that probably 70 to 75% of leaders out there recently surveyed, they don’t feel confident about their leadership skills and most of are not investing in their growth.
Corporations will come in and do a one time. You know, workshop or maybe they get a book or you know something and it’s go lead people. And people leave their jobs all the time because of people. Um, and leaders are tired and the world’s changing. So I like to bring play in imagination are key pieces of what we do. And then we lead ’em through somewhat of a workshop, but then we really put them into a year long mastermind. And this helps them to, you know, individuals to build that over time. So that’s what we do for the corporate side. And then we’re doing, um, I do, uh, [00:39:00] kickoff masterminds with the retreat and then a year long for professionals.
So, Like I going back, I think anybody that’s listening, if you have a podcast, you’re getting into it or whatever you’re doing in your business. What I’ve learned through it all in is, uh, trust your gut. Have some fun. Don’t put too much expectation on it if you kinda listen, you may be guided in a different direction.
And it will just kind of open up and you’ll be, you’ll see a path that’s maybe a little easier, and that’s what I’m realizing. There’s times I like to f it up, you know? ’cause I’m like, oh, I gotta control this when the path is clear here.
Adam Baruh: Yeah, I, I, first of all, I’m super grateful for the work that you are doing in leadership. I mean, that truly is why I. Started my former podcast, the change, um, just being a c e o I, I had dealt with imposter syndrome and I wasn’t in alignment with, I was, you know, kind of portraying what I thought people expected me [00:40:00] to be as a C E O in like the IT space.
And it wasn’t until, you know, I had through just anxiety attacks, which I had never had before, and just appeared in late 2019 and got progressively. Really bad and it brought me to a really dark place. And, you know, out of this I started working with an executive coach who is a, is dear, near to my heart, Kristin Taylor.
And what manifested out of that work was, you know, I, I’ve always been a very sensitive and, and, you know, hopefully an empathetic person. Um, And I started to get really tapped into like messages from like people like Gary V who talk about, you know, listen to your team, like, you know, become a better listener, become a better advocate for them.
Like understand the role that empathy plays in business. And, and I was like, well, that’s it. I mean, that is who I want to [00:41:00] be as a business leader, is somebody that can demonstrate. Through podcasting and opening myself up and being authentic and vulnerable, showing that, you know, when it comes to being a business leader and running a company, it truly is all about the team.
And that is gonna be the only recipe for success that at least for me, that I’ll define myself around. I won’t like, you know, I’ve got some awards behind me from, you know, my company and those are great and all. They don’t define me. They reflect the hard work of my team.
Paul Honeycutt: Mm-hmm.
Adam Baruh: My role as a business leader is, is to really enable them to be the best that they can be, both from personal and professional perspective and, uh, empathy in business, especially after the pandemic and just where we’re at right now.
So key and so again, I’m so grateful. For the work that you’re doing and for the recognition you’ve made and how important that is. Um, thank you to your, to the companies that are hiring you, [00:42:00] because they’re, they’re the ones that understand that. And so usually how I close, um, these episodes, um, is with a two-part question talking about what discoveries, you know, you’ve made in podcasting, like as a podcaster.
And so I think you’ve answered already and you’ve gone to some pretty like, You know, well thought out, you know, answers and analysis in, in that regard. So let’s leave it with this final question. What discoveries have you made about yourself through your podcasting experience?
Paul Honeycutt: Oh, that I’m, uh, passionate about the human experience in a person’s story. Um, I love telling stories. I love being behind the mic. It’s lights me up. It’s so much fun. [00:43:00] Um, I think the other piece I really have discovered is that it is okay to say what I feel and to express my own beliefs and opinions. Authentically because the intention behind that is always love. There’s always love behind that. And what I realized is that when I dampen my voice, well probably the biggest thing is by dampening my voice, I’m really dampening my power and my energy, and that doesn’t do anybody good, especially myself.
And when I give myself that space to just do it. Without the fear of like, well, I can’t really handle how anybody else may react to this. They may not like it, or I may get something, but this feels right and it feels intuitively. And authentically write to me, and I’m gonna say it, but I also know that this is what I know right now and this is what I feel right now.
And that could [00:44:00] change too, and it will change, and I’m open to that. And so I think it’s just that, as you said, being vulnerable is probably the biggest piece, is that being vulnerable is the power because you’re connected with yourself and that it’s really hard to look at somebody who’s being vulnerable.
And you could pick ’em apart. I mean, you could pick anybody apart, but there’s a respect and a level of felt. You feel something different than somebody that’s just saying something. We all know that, right? So that’s what I learned is like speak my own truth. I want them to feel who I am. I don’t need them to hear who I am.
Adam Baruh: I love that. That’s a great way to end it. So the last thing is, you know, where can people find your podcast and, and find out more about you and the work that you’re doing so they can reach out and connect if they’d like to.
Paul Honeycutt: Yeah, so the [00:45:00] podcast, um, is on Spotify, iTunes at Queered up, and um, you can find me on Instagram at the Curious Queer, so that’s my handle, the Curious Queer. And then, um, I have totally retooled my website, so that’s coming up. Um, but it’ll be ps honeycutt.com. So PS is my initials and Honeycutt is my last name.
Adam Baruh: Okay, great. And we’ll have these links in our show notes, so definitely check those out. If you’d like to reach out to Paul, find out more about the work that he’s doing. So Paul, thank you so much for being the guest here today.
Paul Honeycutt: Yeah. Thank you so much for having me on, Adam.
Adam Baruh: Yeah, it’s been a pleasure. I paul Honeycutt is the host of Queered Up and through his business, the Creation Lab.
He’s keenly focused on transforming the corporate environment with a unique, intuitive leadership development that taps into the brilliance of each human being. His passion for growth led him to create the MOI movement.
Paul Honeycutt: A place for men to begin a journey into their emotions.
Adam Baruh: Transformation [00:46:00] and claiming their whole energy, both masculine and feminine. His personal quote, the adventure begins when you’re on bended Knee life is meant to be played with a lighthearted approach. If we simply wanna recognize our own innate worthiness, he believes that it’s time for a significant disruption of how humanity is living.
He invites you back to your imagination and the power of awakening to your true spirit coming home to your vibe. Beyond the microphone is sponsored by podcast. Whether you’re just starting out in podcasting or you’ve been out this a while and are looking to save time so you can focus on creating amazing content for your listeners, go check out Pod a podcast management and marketing platform designed by podcasters for podcasters with podcasts, automated workflow, and AI based marketing tools.
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Thank you all for listening. We’ll see you next time on Beyond the Microphone.
EIQ Media: Beyond The microphone is produced and distributed by E I Q, media Group L L C. Elevate your Emotional IQ with podcasts and content focused on entrepreneurship, overcoming adversity, stories of emotional courage, women’s health, aging, and more. [00:48:00]
BTM S1E5: Paul Honeycutt