Lisa M. Sanchez 00:04
When you don’t know your value, you will allow everything and anything to happen to you.

Kristin Taylor 00:11
Hello, and welcome to How I Made It Through. My name is Kristin Taylor, and I’m an executive coach. This podcast is based on the immortal words of Robert Frost who said, the best way out, is always through. Through this platform, I get the honor of sharing remarkable stories of courage in the face of challenge. Stories that encourage us to step into our lives, even in especially into the heart places, allowing whatever it is that we are facing to shape and transform us mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. My hope is that the people I introduce you to, will provide a much needed sense of inspiration, deepening your trust in yourself that whatever you’re facing, you too, we’ll find your way through. May you see yourself in their stories, and may their wisdom help to light your way. Hello, I’m so excited. We have Lisa M. Sanchez with us today. Lisa is the author of Looking for Love in a Garbage Can: A Journey of Healing, How I Survived an AlcoholicEenvironment. Her book chronicles how difficult her childhood was living in a violent and dysfunctional alcoholic environment. It’s a riveting tale of surviving her father’s drunken episodes, child molestation and many dysfunctional relationships she would also encounter yet her story also describes healing and a journey of forgiveness and self discovery through self empowerment. She has appeared on television, radio, podcasts, and magazine features to tell her story of resilience and perseverance. Lisa is the founder and CEO of Just Dig In2it LLC, a life coach business created to help people come from dysfunctional families and relationships and help them break through their challenges and mental blocks so that they can live more fulfilled and productive lives. She is also the co founder of the positive platform, Lifing and Living with Lisa and Laurie, a company formed to provide educational and leadership development programs to inspire and empower HR practitioners, executives, women and girls to be the best versions of themselves to succeed personally, and professionally. Welcome, Lisa.

Lisa M. Sanchez 02:51
Thank you so much. I appreciate the opportunity to be here.

Kristin Taylor 02:55
It’s really an honor to have you and I was just sharing with you I have your book. I’m not all the way through it. But it is so engrossing and such a powerful and yes, painful story, but really a story in so many ways of redemption, and recovery and healing. And what I so appreciate you is how much you have committed your life, to paying it forward to others who come from difficult circumstances. Can you start from the beginning to share a little bit about your story?

Lisa M. Sanchez 03:23
Absolutely. I start my story from age six. Because that is the moment I realized that there’s something different about my household. And there’s this one story where my mother is picking me up from elementary school and she just took too long. And that always triggered something in me that if mom was late, I knew that there was something going on at home. And my gut was right. Because as soon as my mom rounded that corner to pick me up, I got in the car and I said Is daddy mad? And her response was yes. And right away that familiar pit in my stomach began to churn because I knew that when we got home that there was going to be what I later started calling episodes. My dad was mad at my mother hitting my mother throwing dishes and things across the kitchen table. It was frightening. And so I realized something was wrong in my home. But I didn’t know it was alcoholism. until many years later, I would say my early teens and so on.

Kristin Taylor 04:51
Yeah, so in reading your book, you really do an excellent job and again a painful job in taking the reader with you. You’re felt experience of what you saw what you heard, what you were believing how you adapt it. What were some of the places in your life that you found refuge? Because you feels like there’s so much that fortified who you are today? Can you share a little bit about those places?

Lisa M. Sanchez 05:18
The refuge for me… That’s a great question because I always say that I took comfort in the written word. And so for me, it was always writing, writing what I was feeling journaling when I was feeling, I used to write poetry a lot in high school, junior high school. And so I took comfort in the written word, so that was refuge for me. And then also, it was this make believe person that I thought I was dressing up, putting on makeup, hiding within me, that is where I also took refuge. It was my secret. I always say that I was a counterfeit or fraud. Because outwardly I lived, like I was very happy. But on the inside, I was very hurt. And later would learn that I was going through a lot of depression.

Kristin Taylor 06:22
Well move us forward in the story. So your mother is late for school, you have this gut feeling daddy’s mad, it’s confirmed. And you’re living with a lot of violence and alcoholism, move us forward in your journey, and share a little bit about your siblings and your circumstances. So people can start to visualize a little bit of what that was like.

Lisa M. Sanchez 06:42
Absolutely. So imagine that six year old girl going through those experiences. And then later understanding that it is when every time my dad went to the refrigerator to grab beer, I was recognizing that change in him. And so the things that I was going through as a kid was living the shame of my household experiences. And anytime that would play out in public, it became very embarrassing. For me, there were times when my dad will chase my mother out of the house and then beat her publicly. I still remember Frankie, the neighborhood kids saying, Ah ha ha, I saw your dad beating your mother like this. And he’s demonstrating. And I write this in the book. He’s demonstrating his fist going into the palm of his hands. And so these experiences were shaping and molding, who I was as a person. As a teenager. As a friend. I became painfully codependent wanting to fix things in the household. Because I got to a point where I was blaming my mother. For my dad’s episodes, she was shopping too much. Or she bounced a check. And then that brown envelope would show up in the mail from from the bank that always indicated insufficient violence in my dad’s eyes. And so these things were always triggering my dad, which would then trigger my insecurities. And so I started hair pulling, and hurting myself as a result. And if you think about my household, I’m the youngest in the household of four siblings. Through my eyes. Since I was the youngest, I didn’t feel like they were having any impact. On my dad’s behavior. It wasn’t until I got much older, that I learned what they went through. So my book really is about my story. And how I viewed that dysfunctional home. And it was everything about how my self esteem was being developed. And if I move along in the story, everything I was learning in my home, I was bringing into my own relationships. And that’s what part two of the book is about. Those relationships.

Kristin Taylor 09:28
Yeah, well, let’s move there if if you, if you will, what were you learning at home that informed what you brought to relationships?

Lisa M. Sanchez 09:40
Absolutely. What I learned was that women should obey. Women should be submissive. Women should be the one who keeps the peace. What I learned watching my father and how he treated my mother was are the exact same things that I found in my relationships with men. They were controlling, they were abusive. They were either alcohol addicted, or drug addicted. In some cases, I was physically abused, verbally abused. But also I was thinking that was normal. Because that’s what I saw. In my in my home. Yes. And so I remember saying things like, Well, I never want to meet a man who’s just like my father. Yet, I was still finding myself exactly in that space. And so what I always say is, you can see a better way, but you don’t know a better way. And there’s a real distinction. You can see it, you know, what’s wrong? What you don’t know how to get out of it.

Kristin Taylor 10:58
Let’s stay there. This is so important. And there are a lot of terms for this dynamic. In therapeutic terms. It’s called repetition compulsion.

Lisa M. Sanchez 11:09

Kristin Taylor 11:09
What is your understanding of why you had that sort of invisible antenna? Or sort of that magnetic direction towards abusers? What is that about?

Lisa M. Sanchez 11:22
What it was about for me, is having such low self esteem, such low self worth and value, that when you don’t know your value, you will allow everything and anything to happen to you, which really centers on the name of the book, looking for love and our garbage can to me, represent represented every place and space that I looked for a validation for support or acceptance, and they were in all of the most foul places, entering relationships that I had no business being in accepting abusive behavior when I knew it was not right, saying yes, 99% of the time when I really wanted to say no. And so you get to a place, if we’re moving forward, moving forward with my experiences, where I know my worth, and my value now that I will never hand out another discount or coupon to anyone. If it’s at the expense of my dignity, and respect. That comes with a deep work.

Kristin Taylor 12:45
Well, that’s where I want to go, I want to go to the deep work, because that does not happen overnight. And there’s a lot of work that went into that. So I’m hearing that you said yes. Even though you wanted to say no. I’m curious to learn. How did you know when no one’s showing up? And did you consciously choose to bury it? And then so that’s one question, but stay there because then I want to go into the deep work. When did you start to hear your own voice and start to recognize you had needs and rights and dignity.

Lisa M. Sanchez 13:16
It didn’t come until 2008. And that was really at the tail end of a breakup. The breakup was so hard for me. It was like the mirror to my face. That said, Girl, you need help. Because the knows all those knows what I knew I should say no. And when I was saying yes, and they were those circumstances were happening. Because of what I saw in my home. My mother was the peacemaker. My mother would never argue back or talk back to my father. My father could tap dance all around my mother with all of his antics, throwing the food, calling her every name in the book, and she would not flinch. And so I was saying yes. At times when I knew I should say no, because it didn’t want to rattle the cage. I didn’t want someone to physically hurt me. It was easier to say yes. So that that moment in 2008 when I’m in my mid to late 40s. I still showed up broken in this relationship. So when you’re in the situation when you grow up in trauma and abuse, you don’t know you’re wounded. At least not for me. Everybody else has the problem. Right? It’s it’s got to be Tim Bob George and I’m just naming names. It has to be them not me. And it wasn’t until this fellow broke up with me I always say like a bad habit, where I needed to look myself in the mirror. And it broke me to my knees literally down to my knees, crying and sobbing, what is happening. And that’s when I did the deep work of reading and writing more and seeing a therapist again. Because I did see therapist throughout all of my life, first time at age 21. To really show a light from a hold a light for me to see another way. And this particular therapists really put me to work. I had to do some scrubbing and some inventory.

Kristin Taylor 15:53
Inventory and scrubbing. If you’re open, can you share a little bit of what that looked like and felt like because that is the way through, you have this breakdown, you’re on your knees, the pain? What is the work look like?

Lisa M. Sanchez 16:08
It’s getting to truth. It’s getting to the truth. It’s answering the why. And so I had to revisit my childhood, she helps me understand how all of my choices and decisions are directly related to my relationship with my father. I was still I was blaming my mother, I love my mother. She was a super, she wrote to me, but I was blaming her for keeping us kids and these circumstances. And so I had to work through that. The therapists had me write letters to my parents, even if I didn’t give it to them. It was a way of cleansing my soul. I believe wholeheartedly and soul cleansing, that is visiting every wound that you have and uncovering the truth. It is also a process of forgiving. Never let ill feelings about people or circumstances take up residency in your heart. That is a quote that I came up with. Because when you don’t go through that forgiveness, all of those lived experiences take up residency in your heart, in your bones, and it manifests in illness and all of it. So you have to go through that process. And the forgiveness was very important writing the letters are important. I read books like in the meantime, from a young avanza and I read The Power of Now, by Eckhart Tolle. I even read the book, Eat, Pray, Love. And I swear that author, Miss Gardiner was writing that book for me because I felt every inch of her pain, because it was my story.

Kristin Taylor 18:09
Yeah, that’s why stories are so powerful. I want to back up and talk about forgiveness, because it’s a word we often use. And I agree with you. And it’s something personally that I’m continuing to work on, because it’s such a process. Tell me about the process of someone said, how do you forgive? What would you advise?

Lisa M. Sanchez 18:30
I would advise that forgiveness is forgiving every single aspect of those experiences, whether it was with your parents, a partner, because at the end of the day, people do the best they can with what they have. And so I had to forgive my father and my mother for everything. And forgiveness is not putting conditions on them. Well, I forgive you. But I don’t think you ever want to forgive in that manner. With the same. The same goes for apologies. I apologize. But if you but if you didn’t hurt me that way, well, that’s not a real apology. Right?

Kristin Taylor 19:17
That’s right. Help us understand because I I hear this intellectually, I hear it. And when I work with people, when I have conversations with people I care about when I go through my own process around forgiveness. The places where it gets tricky, is when there is anger, sadness, resentment, and you want to forgive that those feelings are still so fertile and vital and potent. What have you been learning and what do you teach about those feelings? In relationship to forgiveness?

Lisa M. Sanchez 19:54
You have to be intentional because the anger there resentment and sadness, if you don’t choose, and I’m making this about choice, if you don’t choose to blow those up, bury them, I recently put something on my LinkedIn. And it was about my book, that my book was about soul cleansing, that you have to examine each one, including your emotions, and then true and then choose to drown all of them in the ocean doesn’t mean you forget. But I always like to think about what you learned from those experiences, what you’re willing to give up for your mental freedom for the sake of your mental freedom. Because that’s important, you can’t forgive or apologize for something, if you’re still carrying that load, you have to be intentional about choosing to also burry that. I also don’t believe in holding people hostage, either, if I forgive my father, but still carry all of that resentment and anger, that I’m still holding myself hostage and holding him hostage. And I want it to be clear that my book is not about male bashing, you know, because I talk about a lot of those relationships. And part two, is not about demonizing my father because I loved my father. So it’s understanding how to forgive, but move forward by learning from those lived experiences so that you come out on the other side of trauma, living a more fulfilled life. Recognizing life for all of its beauty. Yeah. Rather than staying stuck in the past, I don’t want people or myself staying stuck in the past like quicksand.

Kristin Taylor 22:02
Like quicksand. I love that so much. Let’s stay there. And I knew I’m staying here for a while. It’s because this topic is so very important. What comes up for me, again, when I think of conversations I have with people is part of them. Part of me sees when I’m really connected to my highest value. I want to live in forgiveness, I want to be connected to the beauty of now. Sometimes self deception can come up, like I hear people when they’re in a good place. They’re like, Yes, I’m connected to forgive forgiveness. I feel like I’m living my best self I’ve really healed. And then a triggering event comes and the well of feelings that you thought you’ve buried put out to see, start to surface. What are your thoughts? And how to continue? Because it’s not a one and done? How do you work with that?

Lisa M. Sanchez 22:55
I love that. Because we will always be triggered by something. And what I always say and recommend is just just sit in that emotion for a moment. Understand why it’s happening. Why are you triggered? And when you get to that understanding? You say okay, I know why that triggered me. All right. Now I’m going to I’m going to choose to move on from it. You know what I was very triggered when a certain celebrity slapped another celebrity on stage. Yeah, that triggered me. And I wrote about it. That’s another thing you can do. If you get triggered by something, you can journal it, you can write about it, you can put a little something on your social media, which is what I did. It was triggering because I’ve seen people my mother get hit by my father. I’ve been the victim, if you will, of that physical abuse. So recognize it for what it is. Sit in your emotions for a minute. Understand Why use a trigger. And then you choose I’m all about choice and making good decisions. And then you choose to let it go blow it up. But we are human. We do get those those moments we just own it.

Kristin Taylor 24:22
Yeah, own it, recognize it. I’m hearing processes to practice moving that energy, being aware of what’s going on and then making a choice. Because we get to choose what emotions we want to feel connected to. But it doesn’t mean suppressing the emotions that are out. So you’ve brought up a couple of really important points you talked about. I don’t think these were your words, but this is how I heard it the modeling that your mother created about being a woman in relationship to a man Yeah. And that what that did to your self worth and your self esteem to see that dynamic at play between your parents. Yeah. How did you start to foster, self love, self respect, self compassion, when that was not something that was really cultivated in you.

Lisa M. Sanchez 25:07
Absolutely. You have to recognize that moment and I go back to that 2008 breakup. Something has to trigger, some lived experience has to trigger the turning point. And for me, it was that relationship. After went through all of that work reading therapy and soul searching and soul cleansing and inventory and all that stuff. It created such an empowerment in me. I felt like at the end of that process that I could pound my chest and say, woman roar. It gave me such a confidence. You know, on the other side of trauma, when you can find your courage and your strength, it creates the shield, at least for me, it created the shield around me where I was protecting who I am as a person, an individual, you know, one guy broke up with me and said, Well, you were you were too thin for me. Excuse me. Sir, my self worth is not going to be hung up on your impression that you think I’m too thin. Are you kidding me? So you have to define for you. Your self worth and your self value. And if other people don’t like it, don’t dig it. Not my problem. But it is the confidence.

Kristin Taylor 26:46
Well, yeah, so I hear that loud and clear for people who are struggling with that. Because I hear that you’re like, This is me. This is my sovereignty. This is my boundary. This is my ability, despite what anyone else thinks. To own who I am. If you don’t think I’m beautiful. I know. I’m beautiful. That’s none of my business. That’s yours. Thank you. We’re gonna part ways for pizza drive. Yeah. For people who are not there yet. What are some small steps they can take?

Lisa M. Sanchez 27:14
Looking into the mirror staring themselves down even in the nude. I know this is going to sound strange, but part of some of my insecurities was how I looked in the nude and you get to a point where you have to just look at yourself in the mirror. Love every single piece of you. Tell yourself affirmations. I am beautiful. I am smart. I am a resilient person. I live by daily affirmations. I love them. And to me, it gives me strength. It’s fuel for the soul. And I’m drawing blanks on some of them right now. Because they’re, they’re ones that I just really live by. And then I started writing my own. You know, I used to live in victimhood. I am determined to never go down that road again. Yeah, right. If you’ve it’s this process of lifting yourself up. This is why I love the business that my business partner and I created lifting and living with Lisa and Lori. Because everything that we do, we want to lift people up, because we want them living their best lives. So that means going deep. Yes. understanding who you are. Yes. And getting to a place of self love, self care. I believe that self care, self love your mental health all come first. And what because when you go there, when you start there, everything else is supported. You know how you how you work, how you live?

Kristin Taylor 29:07
Yeah, it’s the foundation.

Lisa M. Sanchez 29:09
It’s the foundation.

Kristin Taylor 29:11
It’s the foundation, it’s the infrastructure. So this deep care for yourself and this devotion to self awareness is what I’m hearing that you and Laurie do. I want to go there in yet first, you’ve mentioned soul a couple of times so cleansing deep soul work relationship to soul. What is so mean to you?

Lisa M. Sanchez 29:30
Soul to me is the essence of who you are as a human being. It centers around your values, what you will and will not put up with, you know what you will and will not tolerate for your integrity. I put something on my Instagram this past week. It was a picture of my dog. Well, it’s my son’s dog but I claim her as my oh I, like dogs are very loyal no matter what I said, I’m loyal to my integrity. Because my integrity, always guide my choices and decisions around how I engage with evil. But before you can get there, you have to know at the very essence of your soul, who you are and what you stand for. I stand for my truth, my integrity, who I am as a mom, my values around access, belonging, inclusion, diversity and equity, my values around culture, whether they’re within the organization or external in the world, those things are part of my soul. Because it’s how I lead my department, for example, for talking about work. It’s how I now engage, you know, new partners, like when you know your soul, you know what you’re not going to tolerate. And that’s important. It’s powerful. You don’t you, you step away from being that doormat that I described in my book where I was a doormat were made for all shoe sizes. That people just stepped all over me.

Kristin Taylor 31:24
Yeah, yeah. What a huge difference. I’m curious. Tell me about the part is still alive in you that is connected to that little girl. That is just part of your soul. Does that question make sense? It never never waned.

Lisa M. Sanchez 31:43
That little girl. No matter what she was experiencing at age six, I always knew what she was going to be. Always. I knew I was going to be someone. I envisioned myself being a business woman sitting behind a desk in a suit, like I am today even on working from home and I’ve got you know, my Birkenstocks on. But I knew I was going to be that. But imagine that little girl with those big dreams, always battling her circumstances, running for her life in the middle of the night, living in, you know, sleeping in her car with a baby, or having to have her son live in someone else’s home for several years so that he can be protected. That little girl who would experience child molestation and sexual assault, even going through all of that knew she was going to be somebody. And here I am today, telling my story, advocating for other girls and women, to roar to soar, to be their best to be self led to be self empowered. That little Carol was and still is, despite it all.

Kristin Taylor 33:25
Yeah. The hope that you are providing the inspiration to say if I can do it, you can too.

Lisa M. Sanchez 33:33
Absolutely. Absolutely. In my book, I describe situations where my dad would come home late because he would work the middle shift. Get off at 11pm. But I always knew if he weren’t home by 1130 or midnight. He was out at the bar. One particular night he comes home and I could hear the footsteps as I’m writing in my book. His footsteps are coming slowly, but sure to come straight to my mother.And sure enough, that night he yanks her out of the bed, goes through his whole episode, runs for the gun, you know, telling us all he’s going to shoot us. I bolt out of the house leaving my mother behind not knowing what was going to happen to her. But I fled for me. And I slept in my little to add a little two seater car, contemplating the whole night giving up my dreams. Suicide what was I going to do? And I chose because I believe in choices. I said this before I chose to fight back. Meaning it shows me that I was going to go back to that house and start the Shit all over again. Because I had a dream. And that dream was to be a business woman to get my college degree to give my son a better life. And here I am today. And I did exactly that.

Kristin Taylor 35:17
That is such a horrific story. In the book, you take a step by step in those moments.

Lisa M. Sanchez 35:24

Kristin Taylor 35:24
And it’s amazing where you are, given what you’ve experienced and enduretrauma is so powerful, it leaves its mark on the body. Is there anything you can share just about your nervous system? And where you mentioned earlier? How much trauma and emotion gets locked in our cells? Did you do any work or you have any thoughts or insights on how people are living with the effects of trauma and how they might start to heal?

Lisa M. Sanchez 35:52
I just want people to recognize that resources are much greater than when I was growing up. I was not a battered wife. I was a child living in the home with an alcoholic father, or at some point became an adult child of an alcoholic as the term is a COA. Reach out, get help. It’s there. Talk to someone don’t live in silence. Run for your life if you have to. Because where you are now could possibly lead lead to death. I hate to say it, but it’s true. But it’s true. It’s very true. It’s such a big threat. Reach out, get help out for me. I suffered with awful migraines and headaches. I was on pins and needles I told you about the hair pulling eyebrows, eyelashes, pubic hairs. It’s in the book. I know it sounds gross. But it’s my truth. At some point, my story is not about me. It’s not about my embarrassment. It’s about someone hearing my story and saying that to me. Yes. And I’ve had strangers reach out to me and say exactly that.

Kristin Taylor 37:16
What you’re talking about with those details that can be embarrassing is that you are facing shame. And choosing a higher course because shame in prisons. And it is the most generous thing you can do. And it’s also healing to you and other people. So I’m so grateful that you’re doing that.

Lisa M. Sanchez 37:34
Absolutely. Thank you for that.

Kristin Taylor 37:36
Right. Yeah, we’re only as sick as our secrets true. And you’re saying this is this is what I did. This is what I lived through. This is the truth of it. Because we live in these silos of shame. And that is where dysfunction abuse can breed intergenerationally

Lisa M. Sanchez 37:52
Absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. And the thing about blame is, for anyone who is still feeling wounded by their past, or even their current circumstances, blame gets, you know, where blame is the path of least existence, the Lika Least Resistance, if you will. Because if you blame others, you always have your finger pointed in the other direction. So you’ve you’ve got to find a way to move past the blame and the shame to come over to the other side of healing. It’s about healing.

Kristin Taylor 38:31
Yeah, the image of blame pointing outward and shame pointing inward, and you’re just staying in the same place and it gets deeper and darker and more heavy. So Lisa, can you share more about what you and Laurie are doing? If people be curious?

Lisa M. Sanchez 38:47
So I’m excited about that. So Laurie is an author as well. She and I had met in 2008, I think at an HR conference where both HR professions and she published her book, January 2021, mine, April 2021. And the more we started talking about our books, the more of a connected her book is a different approach. It’s more about stop making excuses. It’s like it’s a self as a it’s a tough love book about don’t blame others for your circumstances, you got to take care of you approach. Mine is from a trauma driven approach. But we have messages that connect at self empowerment, self leadership, resilience, taking control of you. So we decided to form our company. And so we do master classes and really the space for women and girls for that masterclass because we go through a whole thing about digging in, which is the name of I book or my company, I should say, her perspective is that oh, slap moment, that moment where you wake yourself up. So we bring in these methodologies for digging into self for self empowerment. And then we do programming for HR professionals so that there are really empowered leaders, and to be cultural architects building and shaping and molding, organizational culture, for the employee experience and engagement. And so, we are doing programming in that space. We’re speaking at a conference actually, this week, next week, next week. antastic.

Kristin Taylor 40:44
Fantastic. That’s so beautiful. So you as a child had this dream In the midst of all of it, of being a businesswoman. You could see it, you could feel it, you could touch it, it’s what got you through. When you think about today, and all the things that you are living and being and doing and connecting, I mean, you are really living your values as I hear it. What, what are your dreams today?

Lisa M. Sanchez 41:09
My dreams today really centered around being purpose driven, to reach back and bring women and girls forward, living their lives to the fullest, being empowered to chart their their own path, their careers, not being reliant on others. So I really want to be in this space of telling my story, and hope that I can inspire and motivate women and girls through my story to really come out on the other side of trauma. Living a magnificent life again, so generous.

Kristin Taylor 41:58
Is there anything I haven’t asked yet, in terms of you saying I want to share my story tell my story to inspire women and girls to live magnificent lives? Is there anything I haven’t asked yet to help illuminate that ability?

Lisa M. Sanchez 42:13
I don’t think you’ve missed anything. Honestly, we started from the beginning, we talked about some of the childhood experiences that led to my adulthood, we talked about my journey. I just want to end with lifting up both of my parents. My dad coming here from Ecuador. My mother from Panama, somehow South Central, Central and South America came together in the United States. My dad, despite all of his demons was a great provider. He really took care of us. And I want to honor him. As my father, I wear this necklace around my neck Sanchez is his name. And so I want to lift him up. I want to lift up my mother, who was probably one of nine kids, came here to the United States was able to get a bachelor’s degree from UCLA. And an incredible career as a bilingual social services worker who raised his kids, all of us went to college, we all have careers. She did all of this while living silently as an abused wife. And my mother inspires me every day, even in death. Always find those moments to lift her up and recognize that she was my super Shiro. So there are examples that I draw from even from my difficult lived experiences, even from my father, who told all of us kids, you children must get your college degree. He had a very strong accent, your your college degree so you can be somebody in this life. You know, he always encouraged us, even when he was going through all of that. Those chasing us out of the house and all of those things that he still found a way to encourage us kids to be our best. Same for my mother even wish she didn’t have the strength in herself. She found enough to encourage us kids to be our best. And they are both resting in peace together.

Kristin Taylor 44:45
It feels like a beautiful, beautiful place to end the story. I really appreciate that tribute as you were talking I chose the whole time it feels really important.

Lisa M. Sanchez 44:55
Thank you

Kristin Taylor 44:55
And so kind and loving.

Lisa M. Sanchez 44:57
Thank you.

Kristin Taylor 44:58
How can people get in touch with you?

Lisa M. Sanchez 45:01
Thank you for that. I appreciate it. First of all to say the book is available on Amazon,Looking for Love in a Garbage Can. Also they can reach me on my website, And that uses the number two instead of t Oh, I know that’s complicated. But hopefully somewhere you’ll have my my contact information.

Kristin Taylor 45:28
Yes, well, I applaud you, you are doing so much good in the world. And I’m so honored that we get to highlight your mission and draw people who need you to do so thank you so much for spending time with us today.

Lisa M. Sanchez 45:41
Thank you so much for having me. And I really appreciate the space that you’ve held for me today.

Kristin Taylor 45:47
You’re very welcome. Great job. Thank you.

Lisa M. Sanchez 45:52
Lisa had a dream at a very young age, when so compelling and powerful that it served to help her get through and discover who she really was and is on the other side of trauma. She realized that at some point, her story is not just about her, but about reaching back and bringing others forward. She has found her purpose and is committed to supporting women and girls in finding theirs to personally and professionally are hope for every person who has survived trauma is that they do not become diminished or defined by it, but empowered to discover who they are to. Thank you again, Lisa for your courage and openness. Our theme song and sound engineering was provided by Shane Suffriti. You can listen to more of Shane’s music at If you have a story about making it through something that forever changed, you want to tell us what you think about our podcast. Send me an email at If you enjoyed today’s episode, we humbly ask that you share it with others. Thank you for listening. We’ll see you next time on How I Made It Through.

How I Made It Through is produced and distributed by EIQ Media LLC. Elevate your emotional IQ with podcasts and content focused on overcoming adversity, leadership, mental health, entrepreneurship, spiritually transformative experiences and more.